Vegas, what a wonderful place. The ultimate adult playground and only a few hours drive from Los Angeles. nearly impossible to avoid the gravitational pull when you are that close. So at 8:30am on a Saturday morning a car full of us found ourselves caught in the tractor beam. Being pulled by forces beyond our control to the epicenter of fun in the universe. Just about anything you could imagine getting a thrill from is readily available. No matter how many times i have been the prospect of arrival in this sin wonderland always excites me. Vegas baby, Vegas! Just the fact that you can roll through the streets escorted by a huge bottle of Jack Daniels and no one bats an eye is enough to plaster your face with joy. Aside form senior Daniels as the stand by our arsenal also included a healthy dose of fungus, herbal medication, the benjamins, and the Jefferson to keep all them company. Movin' on up in deed. Once everyone was comfortable we had a snack and hit the sack. Vegas is for vampires. The sun is just an inconvenient destroyer of the wonderful illusions created under the nights bright lights. So till that bastard is put to rest we all catch up on ours. Night returns life to our eyes as Jeremiah, my brother, reports back to our room with three hundred plus in winnings. Things were looking up, but they always do this early. Jeremiah has crazy luck or some sort of sick gambling intuition cause this is a repeating cycle for him. By the time we made it to dinner he was up over five hundred, bastard. The down side to all that is that drinking seems to cloud his judgement for some reason, go figure. Case by case though. At the very least he has a blast playing and it keeps his normally cranky ass is high spirits. That only adds to the jubilation of the group, which at this point is made up of him, his girlfriend Nadia, Brian, Azat, and myself. Our rooms are in the pyramid in the Luxor and the porn convention awards ceremony is going on next door at the Mandalay Bay where our friend Casey and a whole crew of Cirque du Soliel performers are staying. We band up and head over to meet them for dinner. The connecting corridor is line with adult film flesh barely crammed into some of the sexist form fitting formal wear on the planet. Mmmmm, Vegas baby, Vegas!!! Jeremiah buys a new shirt to insure our entrance into where ever it is we finally land while I cop some shades to spice up the outfit and protect my eyes from the inevitable rising up the morning sun. As for dinner we settle on China Cafe. It was empty at the time but they asured us that they had only one table they could part with. Not believing them we opted to stay and assume the cirque guys would still be able to stay. As it turns out they all got turned away at the door and went to find food elsewhere. I tried to find them after a text from Casey clued me into the issues they were facing. Once i got to the door, however, it was too late. Although, as chance would have it, i exited the restaurant just in time to run into, to my knowledge, my only porn friend Chanel. Maybe you now her. My acquaintance with her began while i was working for Girls Gone Wild. Long before she was in film and most likely the employment choice that paved the way to her current career. That is neither here nor there and certainly the subject for another blog entirely all together. At our current meeting , however, we simply caught up for a bit and exchanged number. She told me about the after party and went on her way. i wonder if she was up for any awards?
Mean while back at dinner the food was showing up in courses to all of our delight. i won't go into the delicious details of just how marvelous the meal was but trust that if you are ever in Mandalay Bay with the money to blow. The chef sampler special deal is fricken out of this world. I didn't have wine with the meal but i would recommend some marijuana. It complimented the bounty beautifully. By this time the options for night life were staggering and with the sheer number of people involved making a final decision was damn near impossible. So we hoped around a bit sampling the world class party buffet that Vegas provides when just after midnight we all settled on Tryste at Wynn. It was supposed to be the new hot shit and none of us had been there before, perfect. It indeed did not disappoint. It was paced wall to wall with over dressed ass grinding out their heart delight to the newest club hit remixes. it was a semi circle set up that centered around a huge pool with a five story water fall that blasted cool breezes onto the huge central dance floor. There was a seperate smaller elevated floor to the right that had a strip poll that attracted the tourist as they lived out every midwest fantasy of just what a wild vegas night was supposed to be. Some good, some bad, and some really fricken bad but all entertaining. We had bottle service at a table to the right with a huge window view of the massive water fall as a backdrop to the debauchery. We were also lucky enough to have a go go dance box at the back of one of our seats so the nights entertainment was none stop. Somewhere along the way my phone died and therefore radio contact with the other members of our disconnected was lost completely. Just one less thing to worry about as far as i was concerned and the dance floor was calling like siren song. The chaos from this point becomes a little hard to catalog which is why i generally take a shit ton of photos, which i did. But the big disappointment is still to come. As the night stretches on and the bottles empty into our minds the details grow hazy, like floating through a dream. Until finally all there is is dark.
The next morning i woke back in the room with a grumbling belly still dealing with the previous evenings vodka and no recollection of how things ended. My roommates helped me fill in the blanks a little bit but i wasn't satisfied with the details available so i went looking for the fail safe, my camera. Nowhere to be found. This isn't an entirely new scenario since two of the last three times in vegas have ended with the same results. Vegas baby....Vegas. Seems that you are bound to loose one way or another. Just another sacrifice to the alter of temptation is how i write it off. I want bore you with any of the shadily detailed stories but i supposed i could sum up what i was told. i rolled around in extremely expensive courtyard flowers of the Wynn, climbed the statues out front with a few equally intoxicated females from the club. chatted up the cabby with requests for pot and threats of applying my penis to various part of the car as well as attempting to climb out the window going down the strip. Then once back to the hotel I cupped random boobs, slapped random ass, and made a general fool out of myself. Curtains. Non sense in crying over pilled milk though. i had a marvelous time as always. I think you just have to now what to expect, and that is that you have no idea what to expect. The city is a gamble and just like gambling, some times you loose...and sometimes you loose. expect that and you will be fine regardless of what shape you leave in. Just to be on the safe side and illustrate my point further as we were leaving i dropped all the money in my wallet, 185 bucks, on black. Round and round spun the roulette wheel. Focusing i thought positive thoughts. Jeremiah too added a few hundred. Still spinning the little white ball held our fates. Momentum began to slow and the orb started to bounce chaotically about the metal ridges dividing up the the 38 slots available, half red half black. Unless of course you are counting green but who counts green. Green is the red headed step child of the roulette wheel. It only has two measly spots, zero and double zero. Nobody cares about green or zero. Well that should, cause that is sure as shit where that little bastard of a ball came to rest. Right in the lap of nobody cares. So stand up and tae notice of the red headed step child, cause he is here to stay. Vegas ba-by........vegas.....
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